Possibly a New Life
by kaoru104
Summary: I have travelled the world, and yet my heart still takes me back to this one place. A town where a love had been formed, & the life of mythical beasts still live. Yet, this is also the place where a heart took on a mass of void, & the death of ones desire


Chapter One

I have travelled the world, and yet my heart still takes me back to this one place. A town where a love had been formed, and the life of mythical beasts still live. Yet, this is also the place where a heart took on a mass of void, and the death of ones desires.

That would be the definition of my life. The world gave me no answers. And to think that even through every country, city, and town I roamed; not one encounter with, 'them' was taken. This was the average life _he_ had not imagined, and could not see; but it had happened. He left me, with every good intention, and although my life was miserable then, I cannot tell the difference between the past and present. You could guess as to what happened and the life I had encountered, but I will tell you what really happened.

Every waking moment I thought of him. Nothing could penetrate the passion I felt for his departure and the hopes of his return, but it never happened. I tuned my self into the same routine everyday until Charlie had seen enough. When he thought fresh air was needed, I found my self-moving towards La Push to meet Jacob and his pack. I felt that this new pack was the needed release from my old family. Smiles could be seen on my face more often, thus resulting in Charlie's new interest in my relationship with Jacob. I passed this off with a flick of a hand. I knew of their imprinting and Jacob had no feeling like that for me, nor I to him. My heart was still in love with another, and even after all these years it is still there. Where in my heart could that feeling be? I would not know, because I have locked it away, but if a place like this can still call me then it has to be there. I will not deny it but with what I have gone through, I have lost it all the same. Possibly a glance is all I need to break that shell, but it deems to be impossible that our paths shall cross.

As I was saying. Even though he had not imprinted on me, he still had this infatuation for me. It was hard not to laugh at his attempts all the while staring into the depths of his eyes as he spoke of love. A foolish friend you could say, who obviously knew of the recent events. He expected me to move on, but how can you forget your soul mate. The one you knew to be instantly for you. I most definitely couldn't. I was not built to forget.

Sooner or later a threat was seen. Victoria had been told of the run away vampires, resulting in no conflict to complete her revenge. Oh, but silly Victoria not knowing of a certain pack. Yes, they had protected me with all their strength, and yet I still found a way to screw up yet again. The pack had done a great job in protecting me, no matter what; Victoria could not get through. She would try, try, and try some more but could never succeed. You would think that living with a family of vampires for a year would give you some more knowledge on their abilities, either that, or I just chose to stay ignorant on the fact they are absolutely good at everything.

It was another day in my routine of visiting La Push, except that day would be the day where I got to go cliff diving. It had sound exciting at the time until Jacob was called to make a pit stop. He had told me precisely to stay put, and I didn't. I waited till I knew Jacob was completely gone; I took a step forward and gazed at the water long and hard. I mean it wouldn't hurt to just jump. Too bad I was completely oblivious to the strong winds and the uncontrollable waters crashing against the cliff. I ran and jumped, leaving behind all my worries. This was my one rebellion against the world for taking away my one everything. Little had I known that the world would turn on me and continue to take.

Once I entered the water, I lost control as I was being pushed towards the cliff. I felt my self being pulled towards the bottom. All I could hear was Edwards's voice. The only voice that could call me was his. I listened and tried to pull away from the vicious currents but success was only a false hope. Suddenly a hand grabbed mine and pulled me above the waters, and all I saw was red. I was confused but thankful, I would live. If only I had known what that red really was. I saw Jacob swimming frantically towards me and before I knew it I was back on the cliff. The red was still everywhere, just, dripping. I brought my hands up to my neck where I felt a sting pulsing through my whole body. Jacob was holding my body strangely close and before I could utter a word I fainted.

That day I started a new life, possibly the life I had always wanted; but lets look at the word had. This new life hasn't brought me what I always expected. My looks had surely changed yet stayed at a norm. I compare myself to Snow White: pale skin, wavy dark chocolate brown hair, and full, plump red lips. I would think though, that this could be what I would look like when in my mid-twenties. Those select few have those special powers, mine…. They are of that to be 'human', maybe I was never meant for this life and this is what I have received for entering their kind. I am neutral, I have no scent, I do not shine in the sun, and my looks are of no comparison to those of Alice or Rosalee. I do have the grace, speed, hearing, etc. but I still feel dull. I just want to glamour, to shine in the sun like never before, have the grace like a ballerina, to float. So my new state was just as depressing as before, and that old far off dream was shattered. At the beginning I was a baby, learning to use the powers thrust upon me but now I am that of a grown woman. I have returned to an old friend and will start anew.

My heart will just continue, if it yearns for here, I will stay. When it passes, so shall I. I have forever to remember him, and to forget.


End file.
